i want to always be on film,
to be caught in the cut coffee sober
bolder unscratched lenses of a brand new prescription,
drawing days from a stacked deck and doing doing doing.
i should cut down my caloric intake.
i should go to sleep hungry and wake
up with my guts knotted up
and ears open like a burnt down hut.
i want my mouth to always taste a blade
but i want to kiss like taffy,
hump gentle on a bed of nails and
feel salt to widen eyes like a cut up clam's tongue does.
i want to dump early on and be empty the rest.
i want a patch of blue sky to follow me.
unfold an origami death mask
and cut my dna with rubber traits.
pull apart the double helix like a wishbone,
always be working on a suicide note.

(i don't want to (ooh-we-ooh)
when i feel like i could've gone long(er)...

productive,
fully charged cocked and pointed.
keep a tape recorder on my bedside table
sweats, only the pants that fit the best,
no belts, no cuffs.
walk toned yet loose.
keep peeled eyes glued to a ten.
watch a fly hit a pane of glass 'til he gets real bony
his stomach swells up and he dies.

i don't want to (ooh-we-ooh)
when i feel like i could've gone.